I have officiated A LOT of funerals. Normally, as part of the funeral planning process I meet with the family (as many as can be assembled) to get to know more about the person who has passed away. This is always a helpful time for me so I can be sure to personalize the funeral service for the person, but I also find it is a helpful time for the family, as the format gives them the opporunity to think about the person who has passed and to share some beloved memories and funny stories. Often, people who wouldn't dare stand up in a funeral service and share a eulogy, will share freely in these meetings. It's also an oppurtunity to make clear that you will be preaching the gospel and even an opportunity to quickly explain what the gospel is.

It's not appropriate (in my opinion) to bring a computer into one of these meetings. I don't even think it's wise to bring an iPad. I want to be wholly present with the family. So I have created a worksheet that I copy for each funeral planning meeting.

On the first page, I write down the deceased name (and what they would like me to refer to them as). Anywhere else in the worksheet I have "the deceased" I will substitute this name.

Also on the worksheet is a place to post general details about the funeral, burial and funeral meal. I usually ask if the obituary will be read (which is common in our area), if anyone wants to share a eulogy, if they want to open the floor for people to share memories, if there are any songs they want included, etc.. Often, if it is a church family, we will provide a meal and I can record details about that here as well.

On the subsequent pages are questions I've found helpful to ask. I'm sure I got them from a book at some point, but I've long since forgotten which book it is. These questions are designed to get the people in the meeting talking and to give me a better sense of who he/she was as a person.

I thought that maybe this would be helpful for you and your ministry.

• Letter Sized Worksheet
• A4 Sized Worksheet - for foreign readers or for tablets